random mega epic blog of heavy metal

30 days of pictures.

2011-01-05T08:42:00.000-08:00

so i wanted to start this 30 day thing awhile ago when my cousin told me about it but i never actually posted the pictures i found so here is the 5 days for the days i've been meaning to do it.

day 6 a picture of someone you would like to trade places with for a day:

taylor swift

day 5 a picture of your favorite memory:

creation 2006.

miss you candice hill and annie martin!

day 3: a picture of the cast from your favorite tv show:

grey's anatomy.

day 2 a picture of the person you have been closest with the longest:

minus family brittany tierney or brit has been one of my best friends since 8th grade and she was one of mare's friends since 5th so she's been around for a long time (:

day one 15 facts:

i want to move to bronx, new york someday.

my nieces and nephews mean everything to me.

my eyes are the deep blah blue like a babies it's rather boring.

i have a big sister, twin, and 2 bruzins.

i'm 22.

i'm overly quiet at first but after that i don't stop talking.

i've always wanted naturally curly hair so i didn't have to do anything to it.

disneyland makes me so happy.

i jump or scream from just about anyone trying to scare me.

losing someone i love scares me more than ever.

my dream is to be a 1st grade teacher.

i tend to talk too fast.

every song i here i try to relate to a movie.

i love the smell of the ocean.

when i laugh to hard i start to sound like "a dying goose"

yes, it's a blog.

2010-12-26T22:03:00.001-08:00

i have been so out of it as far as friends go and i'm sorry for that.
without even realizing it i have kinda fluttered away in my own little world.

this christmas could not have been better.. because... i have a new nephew!! i didn't know a baby could bring so much happiness. i love that little baby sooo much and he's not even mine!!

lately i have had a conflict with feeling like going to church is getting me judged and it's frustrating. i am trying to make something of myself. i am not sure how i'm doing but really i promise i am trying. church it's something i'm trying to give another hard go at and so far it's been great. it's those times though when the little comments come out of peoples mouth about how "good" i am. it's not that. i am not trying to be the "better person" or the one that is more holy than the next. i go to church because i feel apart of something. it makes me feel like maybe i do have a purpose.

i guess this is another one of my many rambling blogs.

i'm going mamma mia on you all. haha.

2010-10-06T21:38:00.000-07:00

i was just watching mamma mia.. and all though most of that movie is just super funny i feel like a nerd relating semi to it. (:

"sophie: i wanted to get married knowing who i am.
sky: you don't find that from finding your father, you find it by finding yourself."

oh and this part is just really funny!!

"you're not going to tell me you have a twin sister are you."

12 months time.

2010-08-21T22:48:00.001-07:00

who can say in the last 12 months they have..

gone to disney, universal, and seaworld with twin.

written a letter to a guy with just a name..

got a call from such said guy..

found out such said guy was their dad.

started dating blank.

met sister and her twins, baby girl, and 14 yr old son.

went from training for manager at the grand old cinema to deciding to quit.

moved to enumclaw, wa with the breece's!

broke up with blank.

found out twister is having a baby.

turned 22.

found out twisters baby will be a boy.

the princess diaries.

2010-06-25T22:54:00.000-07:00

yesterday i watched "princess diaries" 1&2.

everything about those movies makes me feel like i have the ability to be a princess too.

i remember when lee took mary and i to see princess diaries 1 and when we were leaving the theatre i thought for sure one day i would have a grandma come and tell me my dad was a prince.

corny right?

i still feel like someone has failed to tell me that i am princess too.

selah community day's oh how i will miss you.

2010-05-12T15:45:00.001-07:00

it's may yet again which means time for the..
the hobo feed
the pancake feed
parade
little miss selah
the booths
the rides
the atmosphere
the first works
i will miss..
just all of you.

a night of slightly different sorts.

2010-04-20T21:16:00.000-07:00

went to community with bryn tonight and i didn't feel like getting up and leaving like i normally do at church things.

tonight was actually good.
if you know me you know if given a true option i will not be one to take part in communion..
but tonight was different.
i took communion.
not only that but i found myself listening to everything that was being said.

encouragement.
and knowing when your heart is being hardened.
redemption.
the three things that stuck out to me.
tonight was just different.
i actually want to make a change. to be the encourager to my friends/ my family.
i realize i have made a hard shell around my heart tried to not allow much in.
i'm going to try to work on that.
jumping from thought to thought seems to be my deal tonight.
sorry to all those reading but it's what's on my mind.

just to let you all know however i want to try to be the encouraging friend, the one that's there for you no matter what. whether you are having a bad day for no reason or the whole world seems to have fallen on your shoulders.

am i not worth it?

2010-04-08T22:00:00.000-07:00

should i still feel hurt, disappointed, upset?
do i have a right to?
i tried best i could to open up.
i know i tend to have a problem with letting people in but i sincerely thought that i was doing an at least ok job.
my trust has now been blown.
i let someone in and it's not enough.
my faith isn't strong enough.
i don't talk enough.
i'm not there enough.
i don't care enough.
:(

just a blog.

2010-01-17T22:18:00.000-08:00

i am blogging for absolutely no reason.
today has not been amazing but that's okay because it's almost over ;)

sometimes i try to see if i really have a basis to be against certain people or upset with certain people. then they do something that reminds me that i think i really do. gah :( nights like tonight or days like today i wish didn't have to occur.

it's all okay. i can only say oh well and ignore it.

believe it or not i do realize how dry and dull my blogs are but i just am not sure how to word certain things. or how to express what's going on truly in my head.

one of the changes i was going to make this year was to be true to my emotions. to express what i want to and not hold back in certain ways. it may not make sense or sound ridiculous but to me it's sort of a big thing. and if i follow through with that change hah no doubt i will be letting out a lot by the time i go to bed. i'm dumb when i'm tired and flustered. thanks for reading i will stop the pain of such a pointless blog now.

it's a little late to be blogging.

2010-01-14T23:54:00.000-08:00

it's almost midnight and i am fully exhausted yet i can't seem to want to go to bed.

i just got off work. after what i thought was going to be a tough night it was even thougher. i am going to be aching tomorrow or today?

my head is spinning. which could either be bad or good my thoughts are all over the place i'm such a nerd.. oh yes.

this is a dumb blog and i'm honestly (a word i seem to be using alot today along with douch) not sure why i'm writing it but i am.

i guess since i really don't have much to say at the moment other than i am completely and fully tired i can't sleep ;) strange i know i'm a tard.

night.

over a thousand no big deal.

2009-12-19T08:44:00.000-08:00

i'm selling pure gift certificates again today
even though i tried to get myself geared for it yesterday i really had not.
i didn't seem to ever have more than a moments break from helping someone who wanted mercy money.
so in grand total when skip and i figured it out i sold over a thousand gift certificates yeah people are stupid and truly go at the last minute. today shall be even funner i'm sure of it.

last night however we had the work christmas party at like eleven thirty at night so i wasn't planning to stay too long. i stayed for the gift exchange and while everyone ate.. then kayla decided i had to be her partner for the stupid candy cane hunt (i didn't want to do it because they hid candy canes all over the theatre in ten different houses and i was wearing slippery shoes so it wasn't like i could run.) so anyways we each found a big candy cane which there was one hidden in each house and then three regular ones each and got first place which meant we got ten dollar gift cards to starbucks... good thing we both drink coffee.. not... seeing as be both hate it. but yeah the nerdy twenty one year olds won. oh and for the gift exchange martin gave me twenty dollars to pacsun i feel bad because the limit was ten i love that kid. haha.

oh and i have been texting johnny because i heard he might not come for christmas which would have been disappointing to everyone...anyways he's coming home tonight (: we decided to keep it from minga because she didn't think he would be able to come and has been down about it. so yes johnny will be home tonight.

how it is.

2009-12-14T22:16:00.000-08:00

i have three days to do absolutely nothing which is both a good and bad thing.

is bad because i don't like feeling lonely and bored but that is totally something i can handle.

it's good because it is still snowing out and my car has officially decided it hates the snow this year. i totally ran a stop sign going on under 10mph. i don't know what was up with my car but yeah i don't think i'm going to be driving to work this year i think i will be hitching rides. but who knows that might change.

when i go back to work on friday i think i get to sell the glorious mercy movie money tickets for the next week nothing else. people are slightly insane and love to spend hundreds of dollars at a time on five dollar certificates. it will be a joy... i'm sure.

wish list.

2009-12-01T13:14:00.000-08:00

random people have been asking me what's on my "wish list" and umm i don't think i have actually had made a wishlist since i was maybe five. anyways i figured it might be fun to make one this year. they things are in no order what so ever.

*grey's anatomy box set (sounds insane expensive but in reality it's only about 70.00 for all five seasons compared to 40.00+ for just one season.)

*last book of the twilight series-breaking dawn or anything twilight.

*the the first taylor swift cd or the newest special edition one.

*anything from fuego haha.

*any of the following posters: the ugly truth, time travelers wife, 10 things i hate about you, or a walk to remember.

*a trip to forks, wa hahaha or queen anne hill to find the grey's intern house bah haha.

*to hear from little miss shantell in someway. (:

*clothes they are always good. ;)

*grey's anatomy game or guitar hero game for DS.

*jason castro cd.

*digital picture frame.

*new converse.

*grey or brown northface denali jacket ebay status.

*anything from the grey's anatomy shop online.

blogs are hard to think of sometimes.

2009-11-27T19:52:00.000-08:00

my voice is going away from asking "would you like butter?", "one cheese or two?", "what kind of pop?", "your change is.. enjoy your movie." gah. it shows how much i haven't talked lately if my voice hurts from talking for five hours. pretty pathetic really. ready for day two tomorrow. joy.

sorry.

2009-11-17T20:45:00.000-08:00

my blogs.
my texts.
my messages.
my calls.
i am to outward with things.
and maybe not enough with others.
so i'm sorry to anyone i have hurt, frustrated, annoyed, or just straight pissed off.

i am backing away. avoiding. keeping in my garbage.
if you haven't talked to me or backed away because of me i am sorry.

my life as described by grey's anatomy.

2009-11-12T20:25:00.001-08:00

"How do you know when how much is too much? Too much too soon. Too much information. Too much fun. Too much love. Too much to ask... And when is it all just too much to bear?"

an iris blog.

2009-10-25T20:20:00.000-07:00

lover face herself.

so she did a funraiser thing at school and earned those things..
see becki i am really not short ellie is megaaaaa mega tall ;)
(:

so for the past day i have been helping get iris' room together. she wanted a tinkerbell room.

which is a really good thing because i had a crap load of tinkerbell stuff at my moms from when my mom thought i was obesessed with her.. so i got to give all that to her. and we found a border at wal-mart which set the theme of the room. so here you go.

iris got a horse from one of those spinny things haha the crap you find at yard sales.. and umm my mom is willing to buy.. and umm my tink pillows.

my old trash can.

this lamp was something i got for christmas and thought was sooo amazing her wings are a night light its pretty impressive.

her border.

andddd the finished room!!

sleepover (:

2009-10-25T10:57:00.000-07:00

after a simpson sleepover ezzie and taya decided they wanted take pictures.. so now i have some very very random pictures of different objects and such but here are some that turned out cute.

notice iris isn't far off in size from taya even though she is double her age. ;)

miss taya eve.
ezzie.

and iris dawn.

i am never going to be a professional mover. ever.

2009-10-24T18:58:00.000-07:00

so i have been helping missy move for the past three days.

and maybe i'm just exhausted or something but these last three days have been super tough.

today was semi okay for the first part and i got most of iris' room painted.

it looks like it completely clashes but it really doesn't when the border goes up... plus she picked the colors.

and my mom and i happened to spot the wienermobile while running to target real quick.

rose davis has a mom.

2009-10-19T20:44:00.000-07:00

kinda crazy but she was a super super cute little kid.

she has always even now worn flower hats.... oh man.

sonu ;)

and these are her kids haha. ps she did the crazy make-up.

soo i don't have an old picture of miss except this one.. missy is the blonde one lookin like a punk.

kitchen duty. ((:

2009-10-13T17:55:00.000-07:00

anthony decided he was going to cook soo that's what happened..

i have wanted to make batman brownies for at least over a year but never actually done it. so haha today we did!

then anthony got carried away with the powdered sugar and umm.. hah then i didn't realize how much was actually on my hands...

when umm this happened.. i honestly thought he would only get a little on him.. but that wasn't the case.

soo here are the batman brownies..

anthony's umm amazingness.. hahaa.

and the cookies i bought but decided to just stick in a pan and add some extra chocolate chips when anthony brought it up.

hilary swank status..

2009-10-05T22:18:00.000-07:00

okayy so a couple times i have been told i look like hilary swank..

haha but then you go and look at picture comparison haha and you realize..

that that's really not the case...

dude i have a neice in 5th grade! kinda crazy.

2009-09-23T16:04:00.000-07:00

iris is 10.5 now and ezzie is 7.

man and tay is 5.
kinda crazy much.

this picture cracks me up they looks like they are hugging and being all sweet but in reality they were about to have a wrestling match..

we tried doing the self timer on my camera downstairs haa and they don't really know how to take a normal picture... ((:
then minga tried to take a picture for us..she got frustrated when ezzie wouldn't smile but that is just not him. ;)

i miss the 1990's...

2009-09-22T22:59:00.000-07:00

dude i'm 21 and haha i miss being a kid!

the 90's were so amazing.

so here is a look at some of the thigns i miss most..

everyday after school it was tang time! i get a huge headache from the stuff but it's soo good.

i remember trying to put a handful in at once and not freak out i never won contests.

you could only be a fan of one nsync or backstreet boys and i loved me some backstreet boys.

if anything i was a the ultimate face of the spice girls. i hate journals, cd's, books, the movie everything spice girls haha geri for some reason was my favorite.

dude giga pets use to be the things that got taken away from you at school and you would freak out because they could die but now it's cell phones.

way back when me and the neighbor boy were the only ones with a gameboy color in the trailer court. the poor guy had a pink one so i was nice and traded my sweet lime green one with him.

johnny, jeremy, missy, mary, and i all collected pogs they for some reason were the best christmas present you could get one year.

doug was and still is one of the best shows ever i will never deny it!

rugrats was like spongebob is now. you couldn't miss it. it was soooo amazing!!

mary and i would get in our beds and be a little freaked out but still totally determined to watch are you afraid of the dark. haha it was ridiculous.

oooo and you can't forget bubble gum bubble gum in a dish... ahah yeah....

byyy all means i was a 90's kid and i LOVED IT!

bang.

2009-09-20T22:10:00.000-07:00

sooo earlier today hah there were like four of us sitting in the living room when we heard a loud bang..

well obviously it was a dumb pathetic little bird that ran into the window.

hah i felt soooo bad. sarah and i went out and tried to see it.

there it was lying on the grass right below the window.

it totally looked like it had a broken wing and foot so i scooped it up.

haha the poor thing just laid on it's side in my hand.

eventually fred (the name we gave him) got over the sudden shock that it ran into something and sat or stood up.

i got to bet him for awhile then outta no where he flew on to the fence a little retarded like and off he went.

((:

the end.

[ps not my picture.]

miss taya eve. ((:

2009-09-08T21:23:00.000-07:00

sorta kinda lover her ;)

it's finished!!

when she was still happy about wanting her hair braided.

tayy dancin' to hoedown throwdown in her words "if your FIVE or eighty two this is something you can do!!"

in one week..

2009-09-04T21:58:00.000-07:00

the past week has well just plain sucked.

i haven't liked it much at all.

but

haha in the words of the afters...

"Look outsideIt's already light and the stars ran away with the nightThings we're said, words that we'll try forget,it's so hard to admit I know we've made mistakesI see through all the tears but that's what got us here"

over the next week things should be turing around. ((:

i will be officially done at the job i strongly dislike with means no more penguin suit!! i have served my time in that nasty uniform.

and...

mare and i will be headed to disneyland..

:D:D

slash universal studios ;)

but after that things will for sure be changin'

hermph.

2009-08-20T17:47:00.000-07:00

why is it that guys always go for my sister's or friends but never notice me haha.

do i lack something??

if i do would anyone bother to tell me??

it's pretty stupid and i don't like much.

i want to be the one that gets noticed if only just once..

now i don't want any 16 or 17 year olds or creepsters..but hah i get alot of those.

i get that i look young but dude i should be given a chance.

hah anyways that's my random blog of the day.

it's not even like me to talk about this stuff haha.

why am i even blogging..

2009-08-18T13:46:00.001-07:00

i have wanted so bad to just break.

to fall apart just for a second.

i'm not weak or at least i really hope i'm not but these past two weeks that is all i have felt.

i hate it.

i wish that some friends lived closer.

that life was simple.

i didn't feel like such a pathetic person.

blah!

it's just been hard.

plan and simple as that.

stupid ramblings.

2009-08-13T21:46:00.000-07:00

i don't know when things will look up.
when i will be fine. great. amazing.
right now i feel alone.
i shouldn't but for some reason i do.

this month seems like it has literally gone on forever.
too much has happened in to short a time.
something in me decided to just shutdown today..
i feel like i lost the ability to break and let loose everything.
there is no reason why at all.
i know i have people who would listen at least one for sure.

i'm exhausted. not in the need sleep way but in every other way one could be drained.
blah.

i feel horrible not being happy go lucky.
but right now i just don't feel that way.
to physically disappear right now would be dandy. thanks.

dinosaur park!

2009-08-11T00:37:00.000-07:00

soo mare decided we had to do something random...

and then i remembered there was a dino parkkk in granger... soo

that is exactly where we went....

i would have uploaded a couple more but it stopped loading for some reason.

thoughts in my head.

2009-08-10T21:25:00.000-07:00

i need to be looking at the positive side of things, the brighter side..

things have been getting tough.. but things have to get tough to get better. there is always a valley you have to make your way through.

i have been in the valley for around two years now it's getting to be about time that i find my way out. people have been pushing me along the way trying to help me figure things out and get things together. for most of that time though i have sincerely sucked at taking any ones advice. i have been trying to get along though..i got to driving, found a new job, moved out of my moms, tried to find out who i was a little harder.

that seems like a lot but in the mix of it all i forgot i'm trying to figure out who i am. this past year i have changed so much. i have been molded much more like the people around me than i want to be. i need to break away and figure out who i am again if i ever really knew. i am so thankful for the friends in my life. this past month has been amazing but so hard at the same time. i have decided to make a big change that i am scared to death of, i realized that i am no an outcast as much as i thought, i can semi stand up for myself and get a reaction, and the best decisions tend to be some of the hardest.

a bit of nothing yet something

2009-08-08T22:57:00.000-07:00

The past couple days have been difficult. i have been trying to just make it through. it seems petty and pathetic but it has just been hard. i know what i am doing is the best thing but that doesn't make it any easier. going to south dakota breaking away and realizing somethings has made it easy for me to actually go through with it and i am so thankful for that. it seems like because i'm on the right path things have gotten hard. i haven't felt like breaking more than right now.

this song has been the one thing i have been listening to all yesterday and today. it's weird but hearing it over and over only gets better. what it says is exactly what i would say if i could think of the words.

"As I sit here and think

About all that You've done

About how You gave me Your one and only Son

And I'm trying to fathom

All that You are, but so far, Lord

You're so beyond me

I fall down in reverence

And I fall down in fear

And I'm asking You, Lord, won't You please draw near

Won't You open my eyes

So that I can see

The way that You are working in me

All I need is Your love

To come and fill this heart of mine

My heart is a desert that has gone dry

And I need Your love to carry me by, by, by, by, by

To carry me by, by, by, by, by

To carry me by"

this is a ramble but what that i say isn't??

a blog with no title.

2009-08-06T23:04:00.000-07:00

to much to spill out at once but yet i'm going to attempt.

i'm back in yakima...

i go back tomorrow and it almost panics me to think about it.

south dakota was more than i expected it to be.

i miss shantell, bill, and now enumclaw.

i need to stay happy.

ever feel like you are on the verge of crashing, breaking down??

i have been like that all day. but i'm okay i will be fine.

to go from something so great to blah in a week is a little hard to take in.

what did i get from south dakota??

i realized show a kid love and they will always remember you.

my passion to help kids is stronger than i ever knew.

shantell reminds me way too much of myself when i was eight.

bill has the ability to make me laugh at almost anything.

i can easily fit into a group.

i made more friends in a week than i have in two years.

when i cry people tend to freak but in a sweet way.

things go on that i have no way of explaining and that scares me.

somethings are really hard to find a way to doubt.

it makes me feel good when people feel they can talk to me.

becki thanks for being there.

even while i was in south dakota and i called you.

if i didn't have you to ramble to i would freak out.

i love you msbff!

changes in a year.

2009-08-06T21:46:00.000-07:00

last year i got really close to mya... so of course going back this summer i was really hoping to get to see her and know how she is doing. three days passed though with mya being a no show. but bill saved the day. the last day we were there i was determined to see her before we left so i asked bill if he could drive us to her house... her cousin tory mentioned she was sick and has just gotten back from her dad's but anyways.. i got to see mya! we spend around atleast like an hour or so glued together. i love that she totally still remembered who i was.. there was doubt that she would remember me at all but it was amazing.

she was so little last year and not to mention she was a little lighter haaha.

she is getting so big! hah but its so crazy to know it's been a year since i met this crazy amazing little girl.

then there is shayna. she is a quite one but she is stuck at your side as soon as you talk to her. but anyways this year when i saw her and said hey shayna how are you she was so excited. hah she didn't remember me but man was she excited when i remembered her.

this picture was right before a ran storm where little miss shayna totally fell asleep on my lap in the church. it was so cute.

can't leave out iane. i am pretty sure i have only heard her say maybe three words. she doesn't like to talk. the first day she was avoiding people but i sat down and colored with her so then the second day she came right to me and sat on my lap it made me feel pretty special ((:

she has grown probably the most out of the three of them it was crazy when i did a double take and realized it was her!

really...i mean... REALLY.

2009-07-18T21:33:00.000-07:00

i think that really say's it all.

ramble much??

2009-07-12T23:03:00.001-07:00

what is it to love??

just in general..

not the romantic relationship love but the other kind.

you know when you are saying good-bye to your parent and you say love you.

or you are saying to a friend love ya.

or any other case..

i really struggle with this..

i'm not sure why..

but it is really hard for me to grasp someone actually honestly loving me or missing me or anything of that sort.

it's easy for me honestly and full heartily say i love you and mean it fully.

but in return it's hard for me to accept someone saying it to me without doubting it way more than believing it.

i hate it but it's who i am and how i feel.

i can't be the only one that struggles with this. i want to be able to believe it when someone says i miss you or we miss you or i love ya or we love you. but sometimes it almost hurts to hear it because i think it's just being said in return to me saying it or something.

that might be part of my struggle with church too. i hate it when i am told god love you he is there for you because that for me is not something i can grasp it's to out there for me.

sorry this is such a ramble of a blog but hey almost all my blogs are right??

don't worry about a thing 'cause every little thing gonna be alright.

2009-07-11T09:15:00.000-07:00

if i am obsessed with bob marley so much tell my why i don't have even one song of his??

(don't get me wrong i listen to his stuff online i just don't own anything of his.)

bob marley has the greatest lyrics and quotes ever!

what do you think should i become a stoner and move to jamaica.. doesn't really sound so bad if you think about it those people are pretty sweet stuff. and deep down i am probably one big hippy.

hah.

anyways i have decided i'm just going to go with the flow whatever comes my way or doesn't i don't really care at the moment. when i did care and worried i was so unwilling to make a change it was no good. soooo i'm gonna "not worry 'bout a thing 'cause every little thing gonna be alright"

geez i can't end this just yet i have to say some more of his quotes that are pretty mega amazing.. and that just make my obsession with bob marley so great hahaaaa...

"just can't live that negative way, make way for the positive day"
"life is just one big road with lots of signs. so when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. flee from hate, mischief, and jealousy. don't bury your thoughts put your vision to reality. wake up and live!"
hah "bob marley isn't my name i don't even know my name yet"
"one good thing about music..when it hits you-you feel no pain"
"people want to listen to a message, word from jah. this could be passed through me or anybody. i am not a leader. messenger. the words of the songs, not the person, is what attracts people."

gasping for air if that makes sense..

2009-07-09T22:42:00.000-07:00

it might sound strange but to me it's the best way i can explain it.

i'm trying to reach for something more but yet i feel like i'm so far away.

i'm struggling and it's my own fault. it's crap.

i am however in the struggle to breath and reach to the top for something more finding or realizing things i should have a long time ago.

sometimes when you think you are close to someone you really aren't you are just someone they once changed...and maybe that's all.. who really knows.

a job is a waste of time unless you like it. for instance i hate my job and everyday i feel as though i am just wasting my time on nothing. it's not taking me anywhere in life.

in the place i once felt so happy and truly unexplainable i now find myself struggling to stay put for just a couple hours and shaking with nerves walking in the door.

what is it truly that leaves me with this feeling like i am unable to reach the top to gasp for air??

so we had an idea..

2009-07-08T22:18:00.000-07:00

Mare and I have always laughed at this picture and we decided that it would be funny to re-create it..

so here is the best we could do..

haha it isn't so great but heh at least we gave it a shot... we're actually not sure who is who in the photo we think we may have done it wrong.. but oh well.

while looking for that picture i came across some others...

i love this picture i totally remember taking it at minga's cabin in colville... that's where mary got stung by her first bee and now screams if one comes anywhere near her.. i love that place!
sooo this is like one of the closest thing we have to knowing what our "maybe dad" might look like... bobbie jean is his "for sure" daughter (the red head on the right)
i love that we are almost the friggin size of missy and she was about 9 yrs. old.

this picture makes me laugh. if you know me you know i have weird scare right under my bottom lip where my teeth went through ( in becki's words i'm "like indiana jones"). well this picture was taken right after i fell. hah i have never seen it before and ya it's pretty funny.

rose.

2009-07-01T21:30:00.000-07:00

who am i?

who am i living for?

how would someone describe rose's life??

if i was looking at my life as an outsider what would i think??

trying to think about my own life i don't think great things.

this blog is not to be a downer i don't want it to be at all.

i am simply wondering how do i show myself.

am i to out there for the world or do i keep people guessing?

am i dramatic or the exact opposite?

compared to my sister or to my family who am i?

do i come across as an amazing christian or someone who is utterly lost??

just curious. this is a blog i would love your input on..

what goes on in three years..

2009-06-30T21:19:00.000-07:00

this blog was suppose to be cooler but i don't have the creativity i though i did.

from looking superrr young and dorky..

to only semi young and dorky -------------

went from being invited to creation '06 to..

going on four mission trips (even if they weren't all out of the country or scary)
----------

little iris dawn has gone from second grade to just about to enter 2nd grade

to entering her last year of elementary school this fall. (even though she still looks like a second grader)

---------
to taking a different path from my closest friend junior year

[no picture because i don't know what i did with all of them]

to gaining a second family that is always there no matter WHAT the situation be it death, birthdays, baptisms, just because, missions, happiness, sadness, just anything. i love them a ton!!!

countdown run summa '09

2009-06-29T22:40:00.000-07:00

so here is my countdown for the summer of '09 something may or
may not happen but hey at least it's something to think about and look
forward to.

i might be goin to creation fest for the fourth time but just
for the day depending if anyone wants to go with so yeah but it's at the end of july sometime.

if nothing falls through i'm heading to south dakota again on the 23rd of july!!
i'm reallyyy hoping mya will be there.
then on august 29th missy bought tickets to see hinder, nickleback, papa roach and some other band. her plan is to just sleep on the ground at the gorge however my plan is to be the DD and get us home that night haha it should be funnn.

then mare and i have talked about going to back to disneyland without our mom since we got back from there like 9 or 10 years ago. so randomly we have planned and booked a trip there! if things go as planned we leave september 10 and we arrive back home the 15th. we will have a five day park hopper with a ticket to universal.

any who this is my countdown as of right now.
(:

discovering james..

2009-06-18T20:38:00.000-07:00

i have been trying to read james every night and sometimes also during the day. i am not sure what i have been looking for but things are starting to stick out. i have been having trouble tyring to figure out how this applies to my own life but what i have come to think so far is..

james 1:22-25 is that has been sticking out to me most..

22Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. 23Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror 24and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. 25But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does.

i have been doing exactly what it says not to. i have been listening for almost two years but doing nothing else just listening. i don't even think i have taken the time to really hear anything.. just been going along in my own little world. that is something that i need to change. people have tried to help me out to show me better options for my life to push me in the right direction. church is something i have been trying to avoid in any form and i can easily see that it could be because i do just want to listen and not act on anything if it's not something i want which lately i think that has been the case.

well yeah.. that is what i have gotten so far. i may be getting the totally wrong thing out of this and if that's the case i sure hope someone will re-direct me.

mr.thomas

2009-06-18T19:21:00.001-07:00

soo i got to visit with my 2nd grade best friend! it's weird that even if we don't really get to talk for over a year we still pick up right where we left off i love it. we have known each other for 12 whole years! it's crazy i remember when we would play tag on the pirate plank at john campbell with mary, brain, and the argon twins.

any who we met at lince and talked for about 45 minutes then decided to walk up to his house and watch a movie. i have been to his house but like never stayed for any amount of time just before a dance or meeting up to walk to school.. and well he has like a home theatre. it's great there is a nice projection screen with red curtains on both sides like a real theatre and then three nice leather recliners with cup holders. i was very impressed. we went through all his like hundreds of movies and decided to watch saved because he said it was like juno and well i pretty much love that movie. i have to say some parts were awkward to watch with him just cause but it was super funny i loved it.

but yesss it was a great visit with my best guy friend. i missed him a ton.

beauty of a storm

2009-06-04T21:14:00.000-07:00

lately i have really just wanted to escape.

you know how sometimes you feel like you just want to get away from everything.

i love my life i do but sometimes it's just overwhelming. nothing major it just gets to be a little too much. things have been going alright but i feel like i can't breathe like some how i am trapped like something is just holding me back tying me down... but yet can't seem to put my finger on it. i want a full blown storm to erupt.

to be outside in the middle of the storm right now seems so perfect.

storms to me seem like a way of just letting loose not holding anything back and just letting go.

i mean rain pours, lighting strikes, thunder rolls like the skies are breaking down but yet it's beautiful in some amazing way.

good times, great oldies.

2009-05-31T10:33:00.000-07:00

okay so really there are no great oldies but it makes for good title..i think??

right now i'm visiting the breece's!
yesterday we were trying to think of different things to do and we decided the mall close to seattle was the best plan so we headed for the mall.
we looked at a few different stores but i have to say the funnest thing there was the photo booth outside rain forest cafe'. i
after the mall we decided to head to seattle to find the troll form 10 things i hate about you.
becki is amazing and drove right to it not even knowing.
haaha i love that troll he is pretty amazing the only thing that isn't is the gay drama club that was going over their scrips right in front of it which made is very difficult to take a good picture but their very phony accents were pretty funny i must say.
when we got back to enumclaw we played so badminton which i have to say i am not so great at but i love it!!

ohhh yeah and i got a facebook message telling me to call someone and yeah i have to say i'm sure excited about what the person has planned it's going to be a great time!!

:D:D:D

today should be radical too bah haha.

taya's bright idea..

2009-05-21T18:35:00.001-07:00

sooo.. when i picked taya up from school and took her to minga's she decided she needed to pick her nose. i told her to go to the bathroom and wash her hands.. but while she was in the bathroom she found a sweeeet curler brush and decided to be sneaky and give it a try. after about five minutes i asked tay what she was doing in there... she came out totally bright red saying "i i i might need help" yeah i would think so. you can't even see how snarled her hair was around the brush. it took me around 20 minutes of struggling to get out before i thought of getting a comb and slowing pulling the hairs out but she is all good now.

it actually makes me laugh pretty hard looking back at the picture she is a dork.

well helloooo.

2009-05-20T17:39:00.000-07:00

soo countdowns continue.. umm kinda..

ezzie turns 7 tomorrow!!

and the terminator also opens tomorrow people DON'T go see it in the morning puuulease.

only 6 days until my schedule comes out and i see what i got off :)

i didn't get scheduled for the 28th sooo that means i might get the 28th-the what ever it was i asked for off!

only around 9-ish days until i possibly goooo to the breece's!

i got invited to jess' graduation on the 6th! she said annie and her dad will both be there and invited me to go to lunch with them after i'm excited!! in the hopes i don't work.. hmm.

boise ashley comes to washington like right around then too which i'm soo excited for.

jen-nay is coming to spokane from SC june 14th and uncle larry is getting married then too!

um i think that's all for my countdowns at the moment.

soo some how i got sick like a cold thing i really dislike it. haha.

i'm reading a book called "19 minutes" and some how i am getting reality mixed in with fiction and its confusing me way too much. the book is basically about a school shooting i think the author is kinda trying to give you a hint of what it was like for the students of columbine high school. all her books i have noticed however seem to deal with the court skip and i decided. she is the same author that wrote " my sisters keeper" i have a feeling that this book is going to be just as good as the that one. but anyways when i like listen to the news i keep expecting to here something about a school shooting which of course is not actually going on.

well. i don't really have much to say. i wish i had things to take picture of but um i really just don't and i even carry my camera with me every where oh well.

tri-cities and back.

2009-05-12T21:27:00.000-07:00

okay so today minga and i headed to tri-cities to get mary something for her birthday.

it was super hard because we couldn't find anything but..
minga found her a couple cute shirts a way cute sweater, and some tanks.

and i found this..

i love what i got her. it was more expensive than i thought but it all totally reminds me of her (:

its a hollister shirt, an ae shirt, a hollister tank, and a hollister lip gloss.

then for ezzie...

i found some super cute shorts with like little bull dogs on them he loves the kind with something like that on them and of course a muscle shirt because he doesn't like regular shirts and he wanted like a simple lego type thing and i found this!! its like a dinosaur skeleton you can build it is actually super cool. i am pretty sure he will love it.

then i got ashley this cool thing but i don't want her to know what it is its not that cool but stills o i cant post a picture of it yet!

and umm ya!

that was myyy day.

monday humm.

2009-05-11T10:38:00.000-07:00

well i'm headed to work in about twenty minutes.

today has started out kinda rough but i'm determined to make it better.

i think after work i'm going to try an convince someone to go walkin with me and if no one does maybe i will take my ipod and go by myself (:

last night i finished a book my friend told me i "had to read"haha it was called "my sisters keeper". someone told me how it ended but yeah they really didn't or i took it the wrong way which was good because then i was still completely surprised when i finished it. it was so intense, sad, uplifting everything. it touches so may subjects it's crazy.

well i just got off work and picked up taya.
today was rather bleh and then again not.

everyone at work throughout the day felt like they were going to pass out i was the first and then one by one so did everyone else. im happy to be out of that place it was awful. rachel got fired too :( saturdays are going to suck so flipping bad now. she always has a double when i do and she is the one who started the nickname rosaaaa for me. saddd day. she sent me a text right after pretty upset. :

earlier i was kinda excited to send a letter to the guy out mom says is our dad but when i went to the post office that feeling changed i felt so stupid after i left. what if he writes back saying i don't want to know, what if he says f*** off, what if he says even if you are i don't care, what if he says i only want to keep in contact with your mom... :/ i'm so worried about it, what if he just sends it back and doesn't even take the time to read it. i didn't tell anyone in my family i was sending it.. that worries me to but i don't want them to know for different reasons. mary said she doesn't care anymore but she goes through phases where she does, my mom would screw it up etc.

tomorrow minga and i are going to tri-cities to get something for mary for her birthday since she already ordered the phone we were going to get her. so that might be pretty fun. then i think lee is coming over for a day or two which i always love :)

anyways yesss that is it. ohh haa and here is my countdown list yet again.
the days might be off 1 or 2.

5 days until: michelle from highschool's wedding that i got an invitation to and am going to if i get the day off.
9 days until: ezzie's 7th birthday.
18 days until: i possibly get my requested time off from work!
20 days until: mary and i turn 21.
26 days until: ashley comes to visit meee maybe!
34 days until: uncle larry's wedding hahaa i'm kinda excited.

nothing-ness.

2009-05-05T18:29:00.000-07:00

my life is not an exciting one when it comes to blogging. there isn't much to it but oh well i will try to come up with something to say.

this past week has been pretty dull. i'm simply just living i guess you could say that my life is almost at a stand still doing nothing going no where maybe??

work hasn't been bad box is boring but at least i have time to think and don't have to deal with six other people telling me what to clean or who to help i can just rip and give tickets and read when i am not doing that. other than work there has not been much.. just going home or getting tay from school.

i feel cut off from the world and those around me which is so strange because i'm positive i'm not but yet i feel like i'm somehow becoming more of and outsider in the lives of my friends and sisters. it's weird to describe but i feel like some how i'm more of someone they feel they have to keep in contact with to be nice. i hope that isn't the case because i would hate to know thats the only reason people talk to me haahaa.

ohh something new is i went to skips college group thing. it was fun to hangout with her outside of work and with haley! i thought the speaker was really confusing at the thing and i started to zone out but haley and i both agreed he was pretty much speaking a different language and skip texted later to say she didn't like him either. there is suppose to be a better speaker this sunday night but i got scheduled to work box so there is probably no way i can get rid of it and i need the money (: but yeah i'm excited for the next time i might go back.

i want to just leave without notice just decide to go somewhere anywhere with no planning..i was hoping to get today's off in a row but not this schedule period.. maybe the next.

oh geeze this is the type of blog that get created when i really don't have much to say..which is super often so maybe i should try to just avoid blogspot when it comes to blogging myself.

struggling to say something of meaning..

2009-04-21T17:12:00.000-07:00

nothing i tend to say lately comes with much meaning..
with any true passion.
it is just nonsense ramblings of my life.

what is it in my life that gives me a meaning that makes my heartache and burn

i have been trying to figure this out for awhile but struggle to find the answer.

so i still find myself struggling to say something of true meaning..

something that makes me vulnerable and open to those around me.

just a thought filled day.

exhausted.

2009-04-18T23:54:00.000-07:00

Today was something else.

I haven't had to work a double at the Cinema for awhile so I knew it was coming just wish that it wasn't.. anyways okay so today I worked from 11:30-10:15. To say the least it was not that enjoyable but then again when is it ever there?

But okay so my day started out pretty alright I didn't have to work with the pervert manager that I truly think I might hate with a passion for the first half. I got to work with Jason though who is the head manager and really hard to read whether he is angry or kidding. ANYWAYS... It was pretty calm the first set of movies of the day and this one Indian lady that always comes came to my line. She isn't just a normal Indian lady she is a religious fanatic.. like crazy fanatic she makes me laugh. But I was asking her what pop she wanted and she goes.. " you have a lisp don't you" and I said " no not that I am aware of, i am pretty sure that don't" she said "no, you do and you can have school paid for for free because you and handicap" .. what the crap! I am not handicap nor do I have a frigging lisp. But I politely just agreed with her and she went on to talk about how it's a scam and they want you to stay in school forever and if you're special they won't ever let you graduate. Man such great times at the cinema not. She came out of her movie talking about genocide and how Satan was in the movie. I don't even know!

Steve the perv manager came to take over for Jason at around five-ish. That guy is such a creeeepo! He has to flirt with like every girl there. He started talking about how is dad use to drink and it was kinda awkward.. then about how he was a planned baby, and then when on to talk about how he plays beer pong and has smoked week like why would i care? Yay for you! It was like he had diarrhea of the mouth. If he knew me at all he would no that i'm not open and don't just start conversations and open up like that. Grrr. Oh well. After all that stuff he was a total PRICK and shouting out stupid orders left and right. He doesn't get that he can't tell us to do different duties the retard should know that there is a chart in back that says all the duties for the day and I did them way earlier in the morning. Man this blog doesn't really honor what a creep and asshole he truly is. One thing I am so thankful is that I was in concession with a couple other people so it wasn't as horrible as being in box and listening to his nastiness. Oo one more thing so the ass didn't let me take out my 2.00 tip after he collected the tills so now my till is over 2.00 and all he said was i'm pretty sure Dale ( the head of all the theatres) will not be happy but who cares. Well of course he doesn't his mom owns the theatre but I do! I'm overly worried now. I can't stand him.

Oh but during break Jenn Kepler called and I hung up not realized I was getting a call but yeah I am kind of excited to catch up with her and see how she is.

And Benny boy called! It was super weird to hear his voice!! We kinda had bad reception so we didn't talk long but I loved it. I talked to him on facebook last night and he is so much like me with all his struggles and things to bad the kid lives in Texas/ Oklahoma. So lame but i'm gonna give him a call tomorrow so that is another exciting thing happening.

Not much else went on oh but I want to Shari's with I think like seven other people from work and some how they got on the topic of how I am "hella funny and it's even better that I don't' have to try" haaa I don't think I am but it's cool some people think so. I was kinda retarded and dumb tonight just because I was super tired and ready to leave. Some chick was trying to start a fight with another worker and I told her to "not fight it" and meant to word it like " just ignore her" but ya so the for some reason thought that was hilarious. Haha and apparently I love everyone which is totally not the case. Oh haaha and they also think I have like a great family. People assume so much but have no idea who I really am it's entertaining.

good-bye chandra hello mr.mercy. >:|

2009-04-10T21:11:00.001-07:00

So today was the first time I worked with the new manager.

To put it nicely he is a piss off! Bleh!

He gets there late! Doesn't turn on any lights or get anything started.

Forgets to get money put in the tills. Retard.

Brushes up against any of the girls working saying oops which it was no oops any of the times he did it.

He has a brace on his hand and when a girl asked him how he hurt his hand he made an awful perverted jesture! He is so so so sick!!

Chandra was the only manager there that was fun to go to work and see. Now that she is gone work will never be something to look foward to at all!!

Oh and to top it all off.. Kayla and Linda were asking when was turned 21 and friggin Steve Mercy was like what you are not turning 21 i'm pretty sure you got hired not to long ago when you had just turned 16 and made me show him i.d. grrr!! That is not something I enjoy being told!

Oh and it's my joy to get to work with him tomorrow night and i'm in box where he likes to sit and jabber away to whoever is in there!

Anyways yeah this is my strange blog about the crappy cinema..

Just a thought..

2009-04-10T17:41:00.001-07:00

water bed and nightmares!

2009-04-01T08:48:00.000-07:00

I have officially had the strangest dream ever. It was so strange!

I have been sleeping on Brooke's water bed which is a very weird thing and I never want to sleep on a water bed again! Okay anyways last night I had the freakiest dream. For some reason that I had no knowledge of I some how lost both my legs like hacked off. But right away I had fake legs that made of wire and rods. I was in panic mode until weekend came and I was in Enumclaw for who knows why. When I got there I was walking around town when I saw Katie and I blurted out "Katie I have NO legs.. well they are FAKE" and she was kinda like "uh what??" I said feel them and she grabbed my leg but my jeans were still covering it and it tickled like no other. So so strange! Then I decided I was going to go find Iraq vets in town that had lost and I went to legs to and give them comfort.. ha ha. So weird. I then continued to walk around town but wobbling because some how I was forgetting how to use my fake legs... but I was determined to find anyone and everyone and tell them I had no legs. Anyways I finally woke up and was totally surprised when I had legs. haaa haaa.

So my idea to why I had this nightmare is because of the lame water bed. When you lay your legs straight out it kinda feels like they are just floating or something so maybe it felt like they were gone??

But ya this is the end of my lame blog (:

pros vs. cons

2009-03-25T22:59:00.000-07:00

Osta La Vista Yakima??

Pros:

Need a change.
College near by.
Chance to grow up and seperate a little.
Near Johnny.
Better church.
No need to text anymore haa.
I will be with the people you always seem to steer me in the right direction if i listen.
Just be possibly happier.

Cons:

Leaving Iris, Ezra, and Taya..
Minga will be upset.
No money.
Quiting a job I haven't had long.
Leaving sisters
Scared of moms reaction.

Add to it yes no?

just thinking.

2009-03-22T16:23:00.000-07:00

off to work..

yeah..

maybe just overly tired.

2009-03-20T22:11:00.000-07:00

man o man
i don't like thinking about life.
it's to complicated.

ahhh! idk even know but who does.
i know i'm missing something.
i know i need to change.
i know that i am not going anywhere in life.

i get that. i really do.
can i just scream??
there are so many thoughts, and feelings boiling up inside me with no where to go.
i feel like at any minute i could just break and i don't even know why.
it's so stupid i can fix my life do something with it.
why am i holding back??
i don't want to.
or maybe i do and just don't realize it.
ugh.

wow this is one crapppppy little blog.

anyways.

2009-03-14T21:54:00.000-07:00

i simply want a friend to be here.
right infront of me.
not over the internet.
not over the phone or texting.
i need to have a friend right in front of me.
i want to just talk.
not even about something major.
i just feel like i'm holding in a ton of nothing.
the kind of nothing you ramble on and on about to friends.
that has not importance.
maybe you have no idea.
haha want "you" am i talkin about no one reads this.
anyways.
night
(:

ramble ramble ramble

2009-03-06T22:45:00.000-08:00

this is lame.

it hasn't been a week yet i want to give in.

my mom hasn't even tried to talk to me.

it kinda hurts to know she doesn't even bother.

does she seriously mean all she has been saying??

if she does i don't even know.

it stings to know she already is telling even people at work i'm a bad daughter and they like to go to the theatre and let me know.

lee even called to tell me.

i want to give to say sorry for whatever i did.

to say please please forgive.

to go back to the way it always is.

i'm not strong enough to put up with her games for long.

i understand no one cares about this that's totally fine to these are just my ramblings.

i don't know what has changed in my life.

i feel like i am missing more than just my mom.

much more.

this is stupid.

life is good right now for the outer stuff but the deeper stuff..

maybe it's not so great..

i have lost any kind of a relationship with my mom.

my high school friends have moved on.

which i totally don't blame i mean come on they went to college.

and church/faith/ anything of that sort..

is the last thing i seem to want to think about.

i tried and worked to grow in my faith.

i was loving it. but then it just ended.

i'm getting back to the same place i was junior year.

it's so weird. yeah idk.

like i said just ramblings.

time goes and you don't even notice.

anyways it's late so i am loggin off.

what a prick.

2009-03-05T22:28:00.000-08:00

okay this is just super ridiculous.

i have been talking to this one guy (colby davis the twin..)

anyways he texted me like the day before yesterday saying..

"hey we need to go to a movie or something"

i said "yeah that sounds good"

we just needed to figure out a time. he worked the last two days and i worked tonight.

anyways so we've just been talking and what not.

he was being super sweet too.

but then tonight the friggin' genius to the theatre..

with some other CHICK!

what a fat loseeeeeeer!

that totally pissed me off.

you don't ask a girl out one night.. then turn around and take another girl to the theatre you work at when your working...

and it gets even better..

he decides to stand in my line i was already helping someone and the other girl wasn't but he decides to wait for me to help him and the girl he was with!

what a retard.

glad i found out he was a friggin' player before actually went to a show or anything.

gayyy face.

i wish i was the confronting type.

happy.

2009-03-04T15:54:00.000-08:00

today has been so good.
no reason why i am just happy.
is actually warm out!
i'm super excited about that!!!

i have the day off. no plans but that's alright!

it's just a great day!

things for some reason just couldn't be better.

is spring actually finally maybe coming??

guess we'll see!!

i love having days where your happy for just no reason at all you just are.

breakkk time!

2009-03-03T16:52:00.000-08:00

i have decided it's break time from the mom.
can't deal with all her little problems anymore.

i should have decided this along time ago but i just don't think i was actually ready.
anyways i am determined to just stay away from all her little drama and problems.
it's too much and it only brings me way down.

i have only not talked to her by choice for two days and i feel so happy.
it's weird i have gone longer without talking to her but not really by choice so it only upset me.

this may not last long but i hope it does.
chances are i will give in even though i know i shouldn't but so far so good.

things are going goooood! i am so happy for that. i love my mom but i don't love her actions.
it's going to be super tough once she starts trying to contact me.
i'm nervous that i am going to run into her somewhere i don't know what i would do.
all the talking about me to other people is just to much.
i need a break. it's that simple. this might seem extremely conceded but it's what i have decided to do so no talking if i can help it.

maybe i should run far far away ha ha then there would be no conflict!

next step who knows..

2009-02-27T18:43:00.000-08:00

Oh my goodness. I have no idea what next step in life I should take. I woah idk. I guess there really isn't too many options but that doesn't make it any easier..

I know I would love to go to college. Cost is one issue but if I really tried I know without a doubt I could have enough money to take a couple classes... the next issue is where YVCC?? hmm.

Should I not go to college and just keep working at the crappy cinema?? This is the last thing I would like to do.. but either way college or no college I will need a job but I don't like the cinema at all.

What about quiting the cinema and finding a job I actually someone can stand?? I want to work with kids so badly but day cares sound like they might be a little hard to actually get a job with.. but anything without popcorn sounds good at the moment wait no fabric either thanks.

My mind also goes to missions the thing is that is never going to put me further in life and I am not near as open about that stuff anymore so not too sure. Maybe the New York internship?? I have a friend that just got done with hers and she loved it but now she is home without a job or school and I know that is exactly where I would be so herm thinking about this I doubt this option is for me.

Anyways ramble ramble ramble. Thanks for listening...

courtroom with a little pain.. haha.

2009-02-25T18:56:00.001-08:00

so today started out pretty good. ming and i were goin to go see marley and me and not plan anything else but just stayin home. but that ended up not working out. but it worked out semi good because missy wanted someone to go to court with her to try and bring the price of ther ticket down. anyways we got to the courtroom two minutes early in the process missing "role call" like we are in first grade or something so we had to sit and listen to all the cases some of which were really funny and you couldn't help but laugh. so yeah we were the last called after two and a half hours or so of waiting lameness. we were suppose to be called like only a half hour after waiting. missy's ticket went from almost 700 to just 125.
after all that missy wanted to go see mary get her tattoo done. yuck. i wanted to get sick the idea of stabbing a needle into your body is kinda gross. haha and mare was getting a tattoo on her stomach fixed which is a horrible thing because we are both way overly ticklish haha and she tends to cry not laugh even if you are just touching her stomach so there she lay not crying because it's hurting but crying because it tickles it was pretty funny. i haven't seen the finished tattoo because missy and i went to go get the kids. but yeah it was lookin pretty good. mary called and said she bled through her jeans kinda grosssss.

but yes that is my day. not much to it.
everything is going well for the most part minus my mom etc.
ohh but minga is like super sad which is no good so i have been trying to make her happy but it turns out i'm not very good at it... "oh well".

what did i do this time??

2009-02-22T21:29:00.000-08:00

for the bazillion time my mom is not talknig to me.
i am always left wondering what i did to get her so pissed.
will i ever actually please her. i doubt it yet i can't seem to stop trying.
i don't want to feel guilty i want to feel happy about getting away from it all even if it is because she is mad at me.

i wonder if i am just rude and hard on her. i don't even know.

i doubt anyone will read this but anyways.

i just don't really know anymore. sometimes i wonder if she is really as bad as she seems. she can be so nice sometimes but then it all changes in a matter of hours i'm so jsghdlfksjghlsjkf i don't even know anymore.

stupid stupid stupid.

2009-02-21T11:45:00.000-08:00

so i'm back in lame crackkkkima. no fun.. even though it's only been like a whole hour or something. the stupid thing is i realized i friggin don't work until monday that makes me so pissed. i'm a retard!!

i love visiting the breeces. i could stay there forever and ever and ever. even though after awhile i miss home but as soon as i get home i realize how much it truly sucks.

but anyways...

i had a ton of fun!

we went to see mall cop last night i loved it so hilarious! all of it!

ohh lol and we went to the mall twice i got an amazingggg shirt! and running shoes anddd a new purse that is more my age lol.

thanks for the great week guys. already miss ya!!

this picture of moses cracks me up!

freakkkky!

2009-02-19T10:31:00.000-08:00

i'm pretty sure last night was like the scariest thing ever.

around like 1:30 i woke up because something i swear was knocking on my window super loud!

so yeah i started freaking out a little but was not about to look outside. then i decided it was nothing buttt no then it happened again then it sound like it moved to becki's grandma's window by that time i was getting super terrified that it was some animal or person trying to break in! ahhh!

so i like bolted out of my room and becki's mom was up watching some show she heard whatever that was too! and went outside to check it out but didn't find anything super scary.

haha she was like ohhh there is a ladder outside your window and i'm not sure if it was already down or if something happened and your window doesn't lock. so whatever thing it was.. was too dumb to open the friggin window thankfully!

i am just going to assume it was a crazzzzzy raccoon that was wanting food because my sister said when they knock on windows they sound just like humans.

but anyways that was my exciting night.

ps the window now has wood blocking it so all is good (: haha.

osta la vista yakima!

2009-02-18T16:23:00.000-08:00

so i'm visiting becki and everyone right now. she came and picked me up yesterday! i love visiting here. moses and solly crack me up! there is always something going on vs. at home where its just work and home work and home nothing ever goes on. so yaaa i'm super happy to be here (:

today we went to like some hue hefner type house that in it's own way is kinda creepy but cool. becki is house watching or whatever you call it so yeah but anyways the house is right next to the green river which i have to say freaks me out the most ahhh! we went down to the river and on the way saw elk poop and it looks super strange kinda like a huge rabbit hopped across the yard or something. ohh and i convinced becki to go and get her hair cut today and when she did i started looking at those hair magazine things or whatever.. anyways so the only hair cut i like or whatever was similar to mine and i looked at the little description of the girl in the picture whatever super creeeepy but it was a twin name rose. anyways wow this blog is a ramble but who cares.

just thought i would say that enumclaw or there arounds-ish wayyy beats crappy ole yakima by a long shot.

be happy for this moment.. this moment is your life.

2009-02-15T16:27:00.001-08:00

i am about to head to work but i decided i need to stop thinking about my problems i don't have any! my life is super good compared to a ton! so yesss i am heading to work determined to just be happy!

--> i have a mom who doesn't do drugs or beat on me.

--> a grandma who watched out for us always and still does!

--> an older sister who would be willing to beat up anyone i asked and can be super super funny when she is just a weeee drunk ;)

--> a twin that shares so many really stupid memories no one could ever understand.

--> a friend (becki) who lets me vent when ever i need to and i know wouldbe over here in a second if i needed her without a doubt. (:
-actually all the breece's are pretty grrrreat!

--> annie and brittany who in their own way always keep in touch just with some spaces is all.

--> lee who is someone everyone should have the pleasure of knowing i thank him for so much.

so yeah. i should be grateful that i have so many great people in my life. nothing super horrible has ever happened to me. i'm sure if i just go out to the store i could find someone who has gone through so much more than i could imagine so i'm just going to be happy and stop being a butt!

sucky salsa

2009-02-15T11:26:00.000-08:00

so last night actually wasn't that horrible although there were tons and tons of couples out for a movie. for some reason the first things i always decide to do at the end of the night is clean the salsa pumps out because they sicken me to no end.. but the one thing i never put together is why my arms always break out in hives at the end of the night and sting reallly bad but last night it finally hit me. the exact place salsa always sprays on my arms is were i break out and it stings. so i friggin am never touching the salsa again i hate it and i can deal with it being super gross!!

curls and my china man!

2009-02-14T15:07:00.000-08:00

sooo bobby my grandma's crazy dog came in the other day after digging i managed to chase him down and just like in every picture i take of him he looks friggin chinese so he is my dirty little chinaaa man. (:

i also woke up super bored this morning and decided to curl my hair just to see what it would look like since i haven't done it in years and well the turn out wasn't that great and it took forever and a day because even after thinning my hair it's still like a horse take all sick.

on more little random thing to add to this blog i am a ps i love you fanatic and i just got my ps i love you poster and you have to admire it too!

crappp of valentines day.

2009-02-13T18:11:00.000-08:00

dude i'm so blehhh about valentines day!

guys are retarded.

it only makes sense that mary would have like three guys at her feet beggin to spend valentines day with her and her stupid sister would have yet again no one.

super lame-o. i get to go to work and see all the cute little couples going out for a show while i'm the same as last year not good enough for any normal guy my age. maybe i should be mexican would that help there seem to be alot of those guys around here.

frggin ugh.

2009-02-12T18:32:00.001-08:00

being a twin can super suck!!

all my little countdowns.

2009-02-11T21:26:00.000-08:00

so ever since i can remember i have always counted down to anything and everything. it's kinda weird but seems to keep me entertained. it's pretty super saddening when i don't have anything to count down to.
but i was thinking and currently i have a few things so i'm pretty happy!

countdown to the breece's! only six friggin days!!
pretty much i count on this countdown now. everytime i come home i feel like i'm missing something and i try hard to plan another time to come over so i have the countdown always going. it keeps me going that break and fun time is so needed and great!

countdown to creation!
now don't think i have it down to days because well my brain is too small for that but it's fifteen weeks woohooo!
can't wait even though while at creation i get super wiped and depending on who is around me flustered but i still loveeeeee all the music!

countdown to my 21st!! only like four months. not like this countdown is all that great because pretty much i am determined to not turn out like my family in anyway so the whole drinkin thing i highly doubt will happen even as bad as my sisters plan to make it happen they are retards haha. what i want is to go to the cheesecake factory since johnny said we would and we didn't lameo! but yesssss i'm gonna be 21 in four months and people are still going to think i'm a whole 17.

dang it there are more but my mind is alkfhdash and i can't think. like you care lol they aren't your countdowns but even thinkin about them makes me happy!

ohh yess miss jennie keith from SC is comin to spokane early june-ish and is gonna come and see me that too is only four months way i'm not sure i will be able to handle her and all her loudness for to long but i will be happy to try (:

thats just my bleh of a blog!

popcorn popper.. with a little greys.

2009-02-06T23:34:00.000-08:00

i once actually thought it could be fun to work at a theatre and help myself to all the popcorn and cheese i could eat.
i wasssss so not thinking!

i am already for a new job will i find one? no. i have got to stick it out there friggin are no jobs around the trash can of yakima.

so it is my new found joy to get to work a double tomorrow. not! it's gonna be a longgggg day. oh well i guess. it's moneyyy which i dooo need. :/

there is one upside this job really does beat being a "professional" fabric cutter for old ladies that you want to run away like forest gump from.

that is my rant.
ohhh no wait one more bare with me here or not if ya don't feel like it.
so for the past month or so the one thing that has kept me happy is running home from work to watch greys anatomy which is probably the best show since mr. rodgers...just kidding if your being a little air headed lol.. no offense i always am. but ya so i have been watching all the episodes rented from blockbusters faithfully and i finally finished the last episode of season four and season five wont come out for months!! i'm so pissed.... and if i decide to watch it on tv i have already missed half the season how dumb is that!! so i'm stuck wondering what's up with grey and shepard or alex and ava or izzy and george! so retarded.

i will leave you alone now thanks for reading if you made it to the end (:

CrEaTiOn!

2009-02-01T21:19:00.000-08:00

if you haven't gone or have no idea what creation is you are for sure missing out.

it is probably the most amazing concert festival ever created! i have been the past three years and every year it only continues to get better! so this is mainly to ashley duncan only the most amazing idaho bestie you could ask for!

okay ash here ya go...

this is the first year i went july '06..

three lessons learned

#1: always wear sunblock!

#2: don't play shy be outgoing!

#3: don't ever fall asleep during a concert!

oh yesss +#4: don't be afraid to break into worship! no one would dare stare!

second year i went july '07..

three lessons learned

#1: late night tent talks and the best thing ever1

#2: porta pottys can and will be locked by a zip tie.

#3: mosh pits are so much funner than watching from the grass!

third year i went to creation july 08

three lessons learned:

#1: david crowder look alikes tend to be walking around.

#2: walking around the campsites talking and hugging anyone around is alot funner than it sounds.

#3: children's tent is actually super fun!